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"I am Stuck with my Do Something List--Help!" || Coaching Call with Holly

coaching call do something podcast Jan 19, 2022

 

Do you love the idea of creating your own Do Something List (DSL), but get stuck somewhere in the process of making your own?

 


You're not alone! 

 


A recent survey I did on Instagram showed that the high majority of our community who want a DSL stop before they even start. (And the rest find themselves stuck on the brainstorm step.)

 


Today, you'll hear a coaching call I did with a Progressor named Holly. I walk her through creating her own DSL from start to finish. As you listen, you'll see what this process can be like for you.

 


Join in with Holly and create THE list that will help you find YOU this year!

 

 

 

PS: The doors are open to the Strive Hive, my online membership group for women who are ready to strive for daily progress in a community unlike any other online. Join us HERE.

 

About a few other things...

 

Reclaim your creative power and rediscover who you actually are! If you’re ready to come back home to yourself, to be able to say that you know who you are and what matters to you, take my foundation course, “Finding Me.” It’s OK that you’ve lost parts of yourself along the way; but as you learn to anchor back into who you are and align your life to what matters to you, you’ll find that you have more strength, more fulfilment, and more creativity to bring to your important roles and responsibilities.

 

Sign up for the Go Getter Newsletter to get Progress Pointers in your inbox every Thursday.

 


 

 

 

SHOW NOTES
Wonderland Math - first month for $1 with code 'ABOUTPROGRESS'
Foundational course, “Finding Me.”
Leave a rating and review for the podcast!
Join the Strive Hive, my monthly membership group
Lend your voice and experience + be featured on the show HERE
Join Monica on Facebook and Instagram
Songs Credit: Pleasant Pictures Music Club

 

TRANSCRIPT

 

Monica: Holly, thanks for doing this coaching call with me. You're welcome. How about you? Introduce yourself to all the listeners.

 

Holly: My name's Holly and I live in Virginia. I've lived in Virginia, my whole life. I've been married to my husband for 16 years and we have four kids and a dog.

 

Monica: Awesome. So you're one of our Strive Hive members last week. We did a huge masterclass on the do thing. That's actually two weeks ago, then we did another kind of follow-up session. And, but you're new, you're new to the Strive Hive.

 

You're new to the, Do Something List. And you were finding yourself, just getting a little stuck and a couple places. And in ways I thought this would be amazing to record for our whole community because I find a lot of women get stuck in the same places that you were. So let's just set the scene a little.

 

And first, just make sure we're on the same page about what the Doucette thing list is and what it isn't. And this isn't a test. I just want to make sure I understand what you think it is and vice versa. So you, you tell me what your understanding is of what the do sipping list is.

 

Holly: I think pretty simply it's. I learned this from the masterclass or from somewhere where it said it's designed to uncover and discover. So I'm assuming that means like uncover what I want to do and discover maybe hidden talents that I have. You know, talents that I have, that have gotten buried in the last forever.

 

Monica: Yep. Talents, interests, hobbies, things you love to learn about.

 

You got it. Okay. So when we went through the masterclass, we kind of had a step by step guide for you. And we walked through a couple of questions. When you went through those two sections: uncover to bring back parts of yourself that have gotten lost; and to discover, to bring in some new parts of yourself you'd like to explore.

 

Did you get stuck on either of those parts during a brainstorm?

 

Holly: I think yes, probably both. Because it's been a minute. It's been a minute since I've been able to focus on me.

 

Monica: That is why I wanted you here, because that's the first place people get stuck is just the brainstorm. So when you were doing that, what kind of thoughts were coming up for you?

 

Holly: Um, "This should be exciting." And I was just trying to think of things that I've been trying to figure out since my kids went back to school in the fall. So things like getting my photos organized or learning more songs on the piano or riding in a hot air balloon, which is my all time goal.

 

Yeah. Just things like that and just making sure, I guess that I spend some time on me, like a little bit every day, because I know since I've been doing that, I can definitely tell a difference when I do it. And when I don't

 

Monica: Because that's something we've worked on with our self-care challenge that we did.

 

So I'm glad to hear that. So you got, when you were doing it, you're thinking this should be fun, but you are getting stuck at coming up with ideas. Right? Beyond those things?

 

Holly: Ideas. And in reality, like comparing my list to other people's lists who probably have been doing this longer. And I'm pretty much like simplicity is my game.

 

I get lost when it gets too complex.

 

Monica: Okay, love that. So you were getting stuck on some shirts like this should be fun. This should look this way. And as part of that comparison to how other people have done it, which by the way, were largely people who have at least to meet this one time before, if not many times who made the Do Something List.

 

So we're just going to make sure that context is clear for you. Okay. Let's skip, let's skip the uncover and discover part what's. If you get stuck here, this is what I want you to do. I want you to instead, just talk through a couple of these questions with me. First is what is, what is missing for you right now in your life?

 

Holly: I think self discovery, like honestly, like doing things that make me me.

 

Monica: That's what the decepting list is. And that's where you get caught in that catch 22. Right. Because you're like, I want self-discovery, but I don't know what to do to this. Okay. So let's do the next question I have for you. You know you are missing self discovery.

 

What feelings are you missing right now?

 

Holly: I think fulfillment, I think, I don't know. And maybe again, maybe it comes back to self fulfillment. Because I feel fulfilled as a whole, like, I feel fulfilled in my family and in my relationships, but as far as myself, like, I'm like, okay, so who are you?

 

Monica: I got to get to know you again. Can you think of a time where you did feel like you knew yourself pretty well?

 

Holly: Probably before I got married and when it was just me and I had time to actually focus on me.

 

Monica: How did it feel when you were feeling fulfilled at that time?

 

Holly: And I think it's all really good.

 

Monica: Okay. Let's get some more emotions to it.

 

Like when you feel, when you used to feel fulfilled, you would feel good. How else could happy?

 

Holly: Excited. I would feel just happy, like, you know, just joyful.

 

Monica: Good. These are all great. So what I'm going to do as a coach is just push you a little bit more. Not because your answers aren't right. They are, there's just so many layers to this, right. But I have to keep pushing you a little for this. So let's go a little bit further.

 

Cause happy and excited and joyful. Those are great feelings, but they mean different things to different people. So can you think of maybe even a deeper layer, one other layer deeper of what it feels like or what it felt like to feel happy or excited or joyful? Like how did you feel about yourself or how did you feel about the things you were doing?

 

Holly: I think I felt a lot more like, girl, you got this, like you can do anything.

 

Monica: Confidence

 

Holly: confidence that there it is. Yeah.

 

Monica: Do you, do you see any connection between the confidence you used to feel when you were, when you knew yourself better and you felt more fulfillment to how you are now and even how you are navigating, creating your do something list?

 

Holly: I will say that I feel those feelings coming back. Yes. I'm putting in effort to make this list and focus on a morning routine. And you know, before the kids wake up

 

Monica: time to yourself,

 

Holly: When I do it, it makes the biggest difference when I don't, I can tell immediately

 

Monica: That's the deep self-care and that's why I love, like, we hit this on many levels.

 

We do hit it. Yeah. The habits of deep self-care, we hit it with identity work too, but we're also going to hit it on, on this way in a way that is also going back to your other feelings. We, so the main goal, I think for you is we want you to feel confident, to feel confident in who you are, what you want, what you need, and with that confidence, even with your DSL, to be able to know this is what I would like on my DSL.

 

I want my DSL to be this long. I want to have these kinds of things or this short, you know, and have these kinds of things. And as part of that, we're going to go back up the layers. You might be wanting to look for things that can lead to you, feeling happy or excited or joyful as part of that larger fulfillment.

 

So now let's uncover. Okay, you can go back to the last time you felt fulfilled. You can go back to maybe as a child, there were things that you gravitated towards, interest, hobbies, talents, things you'd love to learn about or things you love to do. What are some of those things that you used to do that made you feel happy, joyful, confident,

 

Holly: Photography. Like I really like photography, but I feel like that love has changed from actually taking pictures on cameras to making photo books, because that's what makes me feel fulfilled now. Like when I can do that, I feel good. Like I feel happy and I feel that joyful feeling like I'm doing something that's benefiting others, but also me because it makes me.

 

Monica: So do you make photo books every year or every couple of months.

 

Holly: I usually make them yearly photo book. I just started making one for my kids for the year and I try to make ones for adventures that we go on.

 

Monica: Love that. So that's something that's already in place, but we can still write down photography.

 

Holly: It's the time like it's, you know, I love doing it. Do I don't take the time to do it?

 

Monica: Okay. Okay. All right. Let's, let's keep brainstorming to uncovering. What were some things you used to do that brought you those feelings that you were wanting?

 

Holly: I'd like to, I like to go out and have fun. Like I like to have a good time. It doesn't matter what, like I'm not super picky, but I do like to have a good time.

 

Monica: So what about a good time? It feels good. Is it the actual things you're doing or is it the people you're with as a combo of both?

 

Holly: I think it's probably a combo of both. I think it's, I don't really care who I'm with or what I'm doing as long as I'm having fun, as long as we're doing something together. So I don't, yeah. I always tell my husband because he's much more of a stay at home, doesn't need that kind of excitement in his life. But I always tell him, like, I don't care what we do, but we need to go on a date. Like, I don't care. We need to get out.

 

Monica: Okay. So we have connection. We have fun. We have getting out of the house, right? Yeah. I feel like that alone can give you a lot of ideas later on for your DSL. Okay, great. What else? Uncovering.

 

Holly: Let's see. I think I'm having, I don't know, see, this is where I get confused on the DSL, right?

 

Like I'm just thinking of things that like, make me happy inside and like two little things that make me happy are, and always have made me happy is making my bed and having a clean kitchen.

 

Monica: Those are great. Hey, but we can just put down there, if we're going to think more categories like cleanliness organization, like that, that's fun for you.

 

Okay. Like habits are definitely a different kind of list, but what about them can inspire what you want on your DSL? Right. All right. Anything else from uncovering? Which parts of yourself do you feel like you've lost that used to inspire connection to you or fulfillment or fun? Confidence. I think, oh,

 

Holly: I don't know. I'm just thinking maybe the, like the ability to actually do it, you know, like as far as like responsibilities and you know, just family life,

 

Monica: That all got in the way.

 

Yeah. So I feel like the time obstacle is huge for you. And that's something that we want to talk about, but a little bit separately, but that. That is the number one obstacle for sure. If you had the time, what would you do? That's not an productivity, goal related, house management related.

 

Holly: I think if I have the time, like dates are huge for me.

 

Like whether it's date with my husband or one of my kids, I love one-on-one dates.

 

Monica: Love it. What else?

 

Holly: Okay, this sounds so silly, but I just like to go to the grocery store.

 

Monica: What do you like about it?

 

Holly: I don't really know. I, every time I go, I like, honestly can't pinpoint it. Just the fact that I'm in there by myself.

 

This is when I yeah, when I'm by myself, like I can do what Iwant. I can get what I want. I can look at what I want.

 

Monica: I love this because this has come up in a couple of different ways. You need time the most, but as part of that, you want time to connect with others and time to connect with yourself. So alone time.

 

Okay. If you had the time, what else would you do with that? The day is empty. Everything's taken care of responsibilities are covered.

 

Holly: Okay, so this is new. This is not something from the past, but this is something that I actually have learned since I've been a member of the Strive Hive, but I would actually read for fun. Which is crazy for me because I used to not like to read.

 

Monica: Okay. And you're right. We actually have moved into the discover section. I didn't tell you that, but yes. Okay. What else?

 

Holly: I would probably take a nap. I would take naps because sleep is also very important to me.

 

Monica: Yes. Rest. Okay. Anything else?

 

Holly: Yeah, I would probably make some yummy food, like try some new recipes because I love to cook.

 

Monica: Okay. I know I'll never forget one of our Hive Times, or you're sitting there making stuffed shells. And I was just, I kept being like what what's in there and what are you putting in? I actually made stuffed shells that week because of you. So try new recipes on there. You love to cook. Okay. But usually like not on a timeline, right?

 

Like, yeah. What else?

 

Holly: I don't know.

 

Okay. So here's another one I like to just go for drives. Like I like to just go. Yes. When I, when I lived at home before I got married, I would just go out like on Sunday afternoon and I would just sound so silly, but I would like go straight until I couldn't go straight anymore. And then I would turn right. And then I would go straight, and then I would turn right.

 

Like I would always go straight and turn right. Cause I knew I would make it home eventually, but I just loved exploring. I just loved that.

 

Monica: Okay. So I'm putting drives down, but as part of that, what about the drives was nice for you? What did you like? I got it.

 

Holly: Rolling the windows down and turning up the radio.

 

Monica: Do you like music? Yeah. Okay. Anything else about those drives in particular?

 

Holly: No, just, they just made me feel good.

 

Monica: I can see other connections to other things you said alone time, rest in a weird way. Driving convenience. Yeah. Quiet time. I love that you have these contradictory sides of yourself. The sides where you're like, I want to have a good time. And other times you're like, I just want quiet and like just no responsibilities. It just, just go. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love that we can embrace those contradictory sites. Okay. Anything else? An empty day responsibilities. Okay.

 

Holly: If I, okay, so then again, this is another new thing for me, but I just recently learned how to play the piano or I'm learning how to play the piano.

 

So I, yeah, I would just practice. Yeah.

 

Monica: Okay. I'm just going to hold up my notebook for you. This is you don't have to read it, but just, you can see how much I've written down. Yeah. It's a lot. And you came into the saying, like, I don't know,

 

but with this, we've walked through this and now we have some themes. We're also seeing some potential things you could have on your list. So with this, what I would recommend you do is to explore the themes and what things you could do that would help you live that out. So rest as a theme, connection is a theme, getting out of the house is a theme music alone, time dating, like dating could actually be an actual thing on your list.

 

Like, go on 10 dates with my spouse, or go on three dates with my or three days with a friend or, you know, you can, you can decide how that looks. Or if you don't like the numbers, you can say something like explore new places to eat with friends, with my kids.

 

Holly: That's actually since our kids have started school that has turned into my husband and I did.

 

We have date lunches. Now, once a week, we go out to a different restaurant. Love it for lunch. Cause then we don't need anybody to watch them.

 

Monica: Yep. That is so smart. Okay. So, so either you take these threads, these themes and you come up with ideas that can help support that. So like maybe for time alone, you can have one of my favorite ones that I do almost every year is take a Mom Day.

 

And that's where I like mom's off the clock. So maybe I should say, take a day off. Or I don't know, I gotta come up with another way, but that's where you're like, I get to just, my husband takes over all the responsibilities with the kids from morning until dinner time and he takes care of dinner too. So I come home to a cooked meal, which is really nice.

 

I take the day off and I go to a museum some years. I just take myself to lunch other years, sometimes I go for a long walk and visit the library and eat a croissant, like I get to choose, but it's time alone. And it's also time to do the other things that are a little bit harder to do on a day-to-day basis, but still might be on my list.

 

So that's an, an idea. What's coming up for you as I say that.

 

Holly: I liked the day. I like the day off.

 

Monica: Good. Okay. With dinner covered. And the good thing about this is then you get to offer that to your spouse too, right? Yeah.

 

Okay. So listen, we've got a great list here feelings, you want potential themes. You want to dig into an even possible items. To help you create a list from here. Now, I want you to first set some parameters to it.

 

You arrive to this coaching call saying I like things simple. And that was one of your next holdups, because as you started to create your list, that's when the overwhelm kicked in. Right? Tell me, tell me more about that. So people can understand the context.

 

Holly: Yeah, I think too many categories, too many things, because I know how lists usually work, but you put them on there and things don't get done. And this is something I'm like totally working on, but it's, it hurts when it doesn't get done. And I don't need, I don't need more of that in my life.

 

Monica: We don't need any more shoulds. Right. And creating a list in general. Kind of carries in these inherent mindsets. We have about list-making of any kind where we, we put them down as this is a, should, this is a goal this must be done. And if I don't do it, I'm broken. So this is where I want you. If you feel that overwhelmed kicking in and the kind of pressure feeling as just sitting down to finally write your list, I want you to literally put your hands on your heart. And take one deep breath. I want you to remind yourself this isn't about achievement.

 

Of any kind, it's not about productivity goals, resolutions to dues. It's just aboudiscovery. It's about what you've been wanting fulfillment. Okay. Okay. And then I want you to go through with some parameters. So knowing that you're a newbie to this, knowing that you want this to be simple, what kind of let's put in a boundary.

 

So that way you don't create a list that's 50 items long, and then immediately feel like you're inadequate enough to complete them. What do you think would sound like a good number for you to have on your list this year?

 

Holly: I think 10. Okay.

 

Monica: So the tops is 10, but doesn't mean you have to have 10.

 

Holly: Got it.

 

Monica: Okay. your brainstorm might be 30. Okay. I actually be kind of basically done your brainstorm here, but you want to kind of make things more specific when you're doing your first rough draft. Okay. But your finished list is going to be only 10. Do you want your list to be for . . . So we're thinking about time now.

 

Do you want it to be for the whole year or do you see it being better? More like for a six month period?

 

Holly: I think a year, I think the year. Okay.

 

Monica: Okay, those are boundaries in place. How do you feel about going from here now and creating your list? You can be honest,

 

Holly: Still a little lost because I haven't written anything down.

 

Monica: Okay. So when you say lost, what do you mean? So.

 

Holly: Like, if we get off the phone, then I'll be like, okay. So I want time to myself and I want people and you know, so I don't actually know where to go.

 

Monica: Got it. Let's do a few then together. Okay. Okay. We're just doing a rough draft here. What are some possible ways you could explore time to yourself?

 

Holly: Honestly, I can make time for scrapbooking. I don't know if you know, I can make time to sit at the computer by myself and scrapbook.

 

Monica: That one, I think is a great one. But if I were to go through your brainstorm, I would put a G next. And say that's more of a goal more because more, because there's a finished product with it.

 

And also because it's based in a habit of you being able to regularly do it. But there's a way to, there, there might be a way for you to explore it. Like, let's do that. Okay. So what would exploring a scrapbooking look like?

 

Like trying different methods, like going, doing Heidi Swapp's method or going on to Becky Higgins and trying her new thing or doing a chat book. Like, does that even sound fun or does that sound like more of a pressure?

 

Holly: I mean, like I do chat works than I do Shutterfly, so, you know,

 

Monica: kind of seems like you've got that one covered. Yeah. Okay. So that one seems like more of a time one, so we're going to set that aside, but work on it separately though, about creating regular time for yourself. And maybe that's something you can bring to the sticky habit challenge that we're having coming up the goal to be, to have time for yourself.

 

Okay. This is good though. What would help you have alone time? What things could you have on a list?

 

Holly: We said they are making sure we get up before people wake up. Okay.

 

Monica: That's that's great. But that is also more of a habit. Right? Keep going with that though. Day off. Okay. What if we were to combine some of these, would you like me to give some ideas?

 

Holly: That'd be great.

 

Monica: Like what if you were to go on five drives? Or what if I, what if you said, I w I want to explore three new drives to me, local drives. This is just brainstorming. Well, that's a good idea. Okay. So three drives or you don't have to put a number. I like the numbers cause it's fun numbers. And I like them to be some people that becomes a pressure to meet.

 

It's more. I know, I know. I always have to get to 5. Right, but it helps me also get that excitement from checking ones off. Okay. Okay. I'm looking back at your list. What if part of the alone time could have to do with

 

I'm trying to think. Sleep, rest, sleep, sleep at a hotel one night, myself. So hotel night. Yeah.

 

Is that getting any of the juices going for you on other ideas?

 

Getting out of the house was one

 

Holly: This is, where I get stuck because I'm like, Ooh, tend to myself, like things I want to do. So then it brings me back to. Playing songs and the piano, or like, you know, working on scrapbooks. Those are like two hobbies that I have time to work on.

 

Monica: I think we can explore the music one that's outside of goals. Okay. Got it. Practicing regularly is the goal.

 

Holly: So would it be like, right. So would it be like learn to play five hymns?

 

Yes. Okay. Yeah, because your do something list is not goals, but they can help you move towards your goals in a way that's exploratory and fun because if you put practice every day on your DSL, I would say, Nope, that's the goal.

 

But learning how to play five new hyms is awesome for a DSL. Got it. Good. Okay. That's also alone time in a weird way.

 

I really am thinking about the, the photo one, like in how to make coming back. It keeps coming back and I need, because I guess it's a goal or a habit goal or whatever you talk, whatever you say. But but yeah, it's something that is very fulfilling too. So I'm not sure how to add that in. But like, I feel like it's a big part of me, I feel like it's, it's a fulfillment part of me.

 

I could see that. I mean, would it see, this is where I get confused on like goals and habits and whatever. Would it be something like. Make a 20, 22 book for each of my kids. And so that way it's like I'm working on it constantly. You know what I mean? Like throughout the year, or how would that, how does that work?

 

Monica: So this is where I would encourage you to use your own wisdom on this, because what is a goal for one person would be a DSL for another. So like, and, and it might even change season to season. In the past, some of my lists have included the same item and it was swim a certain number of times. And that was a great thing for me.

 

But right now in the season of my life, that's more of a goal kind of thing because I'm so out of practice of swimming. Cause I haven't swam since a big pandemic began. So that's why like right now that very same item would be a goal for me. But for you, since this is already something, you have the skill set on how to do this, and you already know at least to fulfillment.

 

I personally think it's a great way to explore that fulfillment by giving yourself kind of a challenge. Almost. You don't have to hit it though, but we, I think you will, but I'm trying to think of that could be a great way to explore that. Yeah. Maybe there's other ways too. So what would, what was the one you said.

 

Holly: I think I said, one of the ones I said was make a photo album, make a 20 22 photo album for each of my kids.

 

Monica: Yeah. To me, that would be a huge goal because I am so out of practice. But if that's something you love to do and you want to do it, you have the skill set, get curious about it, put it on your DSL. And if it's something that helps you move forward with doing it then. Great. It's working. And if not, then you'll know.

 

Okay. That's still a good goal, but it means I need to have more of a habit set in stone that helps me get there. And we can do a combo of the two for you.

 

Okay. Let's go to fun, connection, good times. One of the things I wrote down on our brainstorm was try new recipes. Is that something that you'd like on your DSL? Yes. How would you like to do a number or would you like to just do like a monthly challenge that some people do, like I'm doing a monthly baking challenge with Sally's Baking addiction.

 

She has a new challenge every month, or do you want to just like, I just want to cook 10 new things. I've never tried. Yeah,

 

Holly: I think that would be good for me. I think cooking new things . . . So I could write

 

Monica: Make 10 new recipes?

 

Holly: Yeah. Okay.

 

Monica: Any other ways that you'd like to explore cooking?

 

Holly: I think. Okay. And so here's another way. I don't know how to say it, but like all the different ways you can like cut. I don't know, like all these different cooking terms,I'd like to explore that.

 

Monica: Okay. I don't know if that's a, a cooking class. I don't know if that's what YouTube videos like, learn how to chop.

 

Holly: Okay. I think class.

 

Monica: Okay, so explore like attend a cooking class or explore cooking techniques. This is great.

 

Okay. We've got a lot covered. We've got some alone time covered. We've got music covered. We've got cooking covered. We've got some rest kind of things covered. We don't really have reading covered very much. I don't know if that's something you want on your list yet? We don't have dates covered.

 

Holly: Should I name that? Okay. So I've got two sections so far. I've got a time to myself section and a fun slash connection section. Okay. Should I call it like Getting out with family?

 

Monica: And at that, and you're kind of speaking, like you're using themes to divide your list, which is great. I've never done that before many women in our membership have done that and it helps them generate ideas and kind of lean into the excitement. But if that is over-complicating this for you, you don't need to do those. So you don't need to do categories unless it helps.

 

Holly: Okay. So. I think I would like what I might do something challenges to be going on a date with one of my kids.

 

Monica: Okay, great. Go on. And I liked it. That's still doable. Well done on that. Go on one date per with one kid. Yeah. Not per kid. Yeah. One kid each month. Love it. Okay. What about we had the idea earlier about visit five new restaurants on dates with your husband. Would you like something like that?

 

Holly: Yes.

 

Monica: Okay. We're just looking again, this isn't your finalized list.

 

Anything else about dating or getting out? Like, would you like to host a girls night at your house? Would you like to go on a certain number of girls nights, out with friends? Or do you want to do like a karaoke night? Like you could even have one thing on your list? Like do a karaoke night with my girlfriends.

 

Holly: Oh, okay. Okay. So I I host a freezer meal group. Yeah. But I'm not the greatest at doing it every month because I let it time. Right. So if I can put that on my list, that would be good because that would help keep me motivated to do it.

 

Monica: Quarterly.

 

Holly: Yeah. I could do that. Or I could even say every other month,

 

Monica: Yes. Yep. Cool. Every other, like maybe it's a six host six freezer meal nights. And listen, because the do something less is not about achievement. Let's say you do three of them. That's still okay.

 

Holly: Right.

 

Monica: It's also a good reminder that your DSL is allowed to change. I changed mine once in 20, 20 halfway through the year. And I changed mine twice last year, just because life was so chaotic with the move and their innovation and, and things going on with my kids' health. So it was, it was allowed to change. Right. So yours is too.

 

Okay. We've got some getting out of the house. We've got connection. We've got dating. Is there anything you think is missing, maybe reading or

 

Holly: definitely reading. Okay. And so I had written down earlier, so I'm not sure if I should put a number with it or not, but I think what I had written down before was to have to always have a book ready to read next.

 

Monica: Okay. So I think that's a great habit that can support both a goal or a DSL list. Okay. So I want you to do that, but what would be a fun way for you to remember, to always have a book as it, because like this year you're going to read five fantasy novels because you love fantasy. Like that's the best kind of book for you is it like read a book club book. So that way you're like, I want to make sure I Al so do you know what I'm saying? Like a DSL can help you be excited and asked or motivated enough to have that habit of always having a book ready for, you know, being on good reads if that's something or following people online who talks about books,

 

Holly: WOuld that be a good one too? What, how did you say it? Always. Do the book club, like every month, every time we have a booklet, like always read the book called, if that,

 

Monica: AGain, this is where you got to use your own intuition. Are you in a place where that would feel more like a should or would it help you feel excited about following through with that like motivated and like, yeah, that's what I want.

 

What if you had something like read Lord of the rings trilogy? Or read the Harry Potter series or like, I'm trying to think of like a way that is still getting you back into reading and it's fun and it might always be the book you have ready, but it's so it's so connected to what feels good and fun to you that that's what your DSL is about.

 

Yeah, I don't actually know.

 

Holly: Well, I guess I could explore. Okay, here we go. I could explore different genres.

 

Monica: Yes. That's four different genres. And maybe as part of that, you can just know, like, I'll try to read one book from each genre this year. So one memoir, one historical fiction, one self-help one fantasy, onebiography.

 

Explore different genres or read one book per genre this year.

 

Okay. Let me count what we've got here. Three, four, right now we've got 12 things on your list. That's really good. And I don't even feel like a lot of these, this doesn't feel like a brainstorm anymore. It feels like a good rough draft and it might even be the final draft. So I want you to sit on this for a night and then I want you to finalize it and send it to me so I can be your accountability partner. Send it to me tomorrow.

 

Holly: I will do it.

 

Monica: And you can either type it up and like said, copy and paste. Or you can take a picture of what you've written down and send it to me, but finalize it, send it to me. And then if you can go a third step, put it somewhere that you'll see on. Like rip it off. If you put it in your notebook and just hang it up somewhere where you will see it often, does that work for you?

 

Holly: Yes. And I'm even gonna laminate it.

 

Monica: Yeah. Wow. I'm excited for that. So how are you feeling now though, about this list?

 

Holly: Way better, way better. This has been amazing.

 

Monica: Good. And the good news is now that you have the. Under your belt. It won't be this hard each year from here on out. Right? This is learning a whole new thing, you know, it's, it's, it's, it takes time to set it up.

 

But now that you have set up, you can, you can move forward. And what we're going to do in the strive hive is we're going to start really getting clear about intentions for the month on what we're going to work towards on our do something list and have more exciting to be celebrated for what we're doing and how we're checking it off. Like we'll have badges and prizes and stuff like that coming up soon. And ways of tracking, I've learned, that's a big thing too. People want ways of tracking it, whether it's just checking off on their list or having an app for it or whatever else. So you don't have to worry about that yet though.

 

We'll walk through it. This was awesome. I so appreciate that you would be willing to do this and in a public way, and just love that you're yourself. And if I'd been in your shoes, I probably would have been a nervous wreck and totally like you're just Holly. Love it. Well, I can't wait to see what you do.

 

I also can't wait to steal the recipe. That you find are really good or the books that you love. I want to steal some of those to the cookie class one, like there's so many I connect with. I really want you to do at least one kind of break, whether it's a day off or the hotel night, if you only have one of those on your list, I'll be super happy.

 

Holly: I'm actually super excited about the hotel night.

 

Monica: That's yeah, that seems like that's that's for you. Okay. Holly, I feel like we're in a good space and I can't wait to hear from you. Okay. The finalized list coming up.

 

Holly: Thanks so much, Monica.

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